Teen Girls Dating Brutal Boys!

Teen Girls With Brutal Boys!

A teen girl stands in the corner of a sports shoe store with her hoodie pulled down over her head, tied loosely at the chin, looking down. At first sight, a person would think, “Oh she is just another emo” (label given to teens that wear a more melodic and less chaotic style of dress.) But at a second glance, you can see out of the corner of your eye, the girl has a cut lip, slight bruising above her lip ring. A boy not much older than she is, comes from around the table in the store, grabs her hand assertively and walks off. I could have followed them and asked her if she was alright, but I watched them walk, thinking what good would my questioning do! Girls today, (1 out of 3) will be abused by a boy and that boy will get away with it. The girl will make excuses for him, saying it is not that bad, that it will get better and wait for change. Sometimes that change comes too late! If pushed to get away from the boy in question, the girl will more likely return to the relationship, thinking you are trying to control her as an adult. Most will not admit it, but until the girl herself wants change, there will be nothing altered.

Teens are reluctant to talk to their parents about this subject, the logic goes, and they turn to their peers instead. So what parents can do to help is make sure those peers are educated and informed- and hope for a sort of salvation by people their own age.
What I taught my daughters when they were growing up is mainly self respect. Through self respect a lot of things follow. I told them that there are good men out there, that no one has to put up with fear or abuse in their relationship. The first sign of disrespect be it verbal abuse or physical abuse is a sign to leave that relationship behind. There's always "I'm sorry" and "it wont happen again" but it will happen again. I am a low maintenance laid back person. I take most things with a grain of salt. I had enough respect for myself to know that I would not accept that kind of reaction/response. I'd drop anyone in a minute that didn't treat me as I treat them. That is the basis I live by and I try and pass that on to my daughters. No one deserves to be verbally or physically attacked in a relationship. It seems to be a power trip for some, a calculating issue, to do those things. My mentality is "see how much control or power you have after I'm gone". You get one chance, you abuse that option, and you become another statistic in my opinion. I would want every girl out there to understand, never give up your power as a human being, no one has the right to treat you any other way, then a equal, with respect and admiration!
But it's all about the girls knowing that they are strong enough to stand alone to take up for themselves. That they have enough self respect to know they are above it and deserve better. It is important for girls to have a support group within their circle of friends that can help them through any given situation and show them another route.
Boys at an early age, need to be taught respect, how to treat girls, women and one another. It starts with words that are taught as a life lesson and it becomes habitual to treat others with love, reverence and understanding. Girls are a boy’s equal on every level, and when a person grows up with that thinking, the ground becomes even, a stronger foundation is leveled and we become better people by the lessons we are both taught and educated.

If you are a teenage girl, feeling you are ready to move on from an abusive relationship, you can visit www.loveisrespect.org or call the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline (1-866-331-9474, or TTY 1-866-331-8453.) Love is never suppose to hurt! ! ! !